Sunday, April 03, 2022

TMW a memoir creates powerful connection between author and reader

When Bald in the Land of Big Hair was originally published by Harper Collins in 2001, I had no reason to expect that this funny little book by a nobody novelist would take on a quietly powerful life of its own. During its first year, BLBH was translated and published around the world, condensed by Reader’s Digest, excerpted in Good Housekeeping, and featured in a special on Oprah’s new TV channel. Later, it was adapted for an off-Broadway touring show, and in 2011, a 10th anniversary edition was published with a lovely forward by Elizabeth Berg. This book put my name on the bestseller lists for the first time, launched a robust public speaking side gig, and opened the door for my unexpected career as a ghostwriter and memoir guru. 

All this was tremendously rewarding, and I’m grateful. An intensely personal memoir takes a lot out of a person; there’s a cost to the author and her family. This book was the realization of the promise in Ecclesiastes: Cast your bread upon the water; in time, it will return a hundredfold. For me, the greatest gift has been 20-plus years of rich correspondence and chance encounters with readers. 

About five years after Bald in the Land of Big Hair was published, I received a long, heart-wrenching email from a Wall Street executive whose daughter, like me, was diagnosed with lymphoma as a young mom. He told me someone had given her an autographed copy of my book. As she struggled through a grueling year of chemo, she’d read it several times and copied bits and quotes from it on Post-it notes that peppered her bathroom mirror, bulletin boards, and refrigerator. 

“She wanted to talk to me about what she was going through,” he said, “but I wanted to keep up that damn stupid positive attitude.”

Frustrated, she’d told him, “If you ever want to know what it was really like, read this book.” 
She always took it with her when she checked into the hospital, so she had it with her when she began losing ground and slipped into an end stage haze. The man pulled his chair close to the bed and read the whole book to his daughter during the long last night of her life. In the morning, he wrote to me: “They say it’ll be another hour or two.” 

He said he felt compelled to email me because he’d missed his opportunity to talk to her about what she was going through, but now he felt as though he’d laughed and cried with her, that he’d shared in her journey, and that on some level, she knew, because she knew he would eventually read this book.

“Thank you,” he said, “for giving me a way to reach her.”

It was one of the most precious moments of my writing life. 

A few years later, I spoke at a large survivorship event and was signing books afterward, doing my best to hug and listen to each person in the long line but feeling very weary after a long day of travel and workshops. A woman came forward with a hardcover first edition copy of BLBH. The binding was broken, the dust jacket tattered and coffee-stained, and leafing through the dogeared pages, I could see that the well-worn book had been passed from that original reader to a sister, to a friend, to a daughter, to a book club mate, to a neighbor, to a chemo buddy—one reader after another—each adding notes and highlights in a kaleidoscope of colored pencils, inks, highlighters, and sticky notes. My story had become a conversation. 

Opening the book to the title page, I saw that I had already signed it back in 2001: To my sister in survivorship—shalom and joy, Joni Rodgers

I thought of the stockbroker’s daughter, how she and I, together, had found the language to get past her father’s stiff upper lip and allow him to let her go. This couldn’t possibly be hers; of course, I knew the vanishingly small odds of that. But in a rush came the realization that this book was one of thousands. There were others, each with its own chorus of voices chiming in with love and support for one another, sharing hopes and fears, creating a sacred space for laughter and tears. They were out there all along; I just didn’t know it. 

Not gonna lie. I cried. Oh, how I wish I could have put that gorgeously dilapidated volume in a shadowbox in my office! But it wasn’t mine to keep. When I wrote this book, I made the choice to share my story, and with that choice comes the understanding that writers have no control over how or where our words will land—which is ample reason to choose those words with care. 
I launched this little paper sailboat into the stream of consciousness more than two decades ago. Readers are the wind and water that carried it around the world, beyond time, and back to me. It was a profound privilege to hold the proof of that in my hands, a far more meaningful metric for “success” than any bestseller list or bank deposit.

Next to the hurried autograph of the my hopeful young author self, I added a brief note from my older, wiser self and sent the book on its way.

It belongs to you now. May it bring you peace.

A refreshed ebook edition of Bald in the Land of Big Hair is now available. The original paperback editions is available wherever books are sold.

Saturday, April 02, 2022

How to love a bald woman, especially if that woman is yourself

The bald girl flashpoint at this year's Oscars stirred up memories of what it felt like to be a bald girl in the Big Hair Capital of America.

Big hair in Texas gives bees beehive envy. It’s prerequisite for a real estate license, a symbol of potent femininity and sensual largess. If people are willing to sit behind you in a movie theater, you’re just not doing it right. 

I was 32, a working mom living in Houston, when I was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma, a potentially lethal blood cancer. A few weeks into the aggressive chemo, I wasn’t just bald, I was salamander. No eyebrows. No eyelashes. No, um…etcetera. I’m not sure I still qualified as a mammal. Even if I could have found a wig that didn’t make me look like Betty Rubble, the summer heat in Houston made wigs, hats, and turbans unbearable. 

If I went out with my head uncovered, people called me “sir.” They stared. They snickered. They judged, because it’s human nature to judge first and ask questions later. During a break at my chi gong class one night, I bent down to get a drink from a water fountain, and when I stood up, the young man in line behind me was visibly startled. He glanced down at the floor and then crossed to the other side of the gym to drink from a different water fountain. 

For most women, involuntary baldness is a painful experience. This isn’t about vanity; it’s about isolation, separation, and nonsensical cultural bias. My main problem wasn’t the abnormal situation on top of my head; it was the toxic assumptions in the heads of people around me. For me, baldness was the manifestation of the inward exile I’d felt as an awkwardly tall, utterly flat-chested, bisexual girl in a bitchily insular fundamentalist Christian high school. Now my true freak status was out there for all to see. And it was weirdly liberating. 

At the moment I was faced with my own mortality, baldness freed me to live in my own skin, finally accepting myself as I am because this is the only self available to me in this lifetime; I can either rock it or die trying to be someone else. I became addicted to the clean, comfortable feeling of baldness, because I liked the feeling of an unabridged me

My hair grew back after a couple years, but it still gets thin and patchy when I’m sick or stressed, so I’ve buzzed it off many times for practical reasons or just because I felt like it. People used to say how “brave” it was for me to be openly bald. And now they say how “brave” it is for me to not color my gray hair. The subtext of both these backhanded compliments is a reminder that I’m not the woman the world says I’m supposed to be. And I’m cool with that.


I’ve been praised for having a sense of humor about it all in my memoir Bald in the Land of Big Hair (HarperCollins 2001), but when late night comics held up Britney Spears shaving her head as evidence of her mental instability, I wasn’t laughing. And I didn’t laugh at Chris Rock’s “G.I. Jane” joke at the Oscars. It was a cheap laugh at the expense of Jada Pinkett Smith, who’s spoken openly about her alopecia. But more offensive than the joke itself was the response of Jada’s husband, Will Smith, who strode up to the stage and gave Chris Rock a swift slap upside the head. 

It was inexcusable that the show’s producers allowed Smith to remain in the theater. And then presented him with a prestigious award. And then let him blather on about “protecting” his wife, who strikes me as a person who's capable of defending herself. Frankly, his reaction showed how sensitive he is to her baldness, like it’s a handicap or a disease or a “we don’t talk about Bruno” type mortification to the family. 

When I was bald, my husband didn’t “protect” me by acting like a jackass or trying to take ownership of my pain. He stood up for me by shaving his own head in solidarity.

If you really want to support a woman who’s bald, respect her for having the courage to be herself. Show her you don’t fear contagion or distrust her sanity. And be grateful, because that beautiful bald head signals how welcome you are to be your own unique self when you’re around her.  

Peace and grooviness to all.
jr
 

Monday, March 21, 2022

I wish this novel would stop being so f#cking relevant :/

I wrote my second novel in the mid-1990s, a young mom in the crucible of chemo and recovery: swamped with pharmaceuticals, living in immune-compromised isolation, and immersed in the sort of books you read when you think you’re dying. 

Till We Have Faces by C. S. Lewis, a philosophical retelling of the Psyche and Eros myth, blew my mind and prompted a Bullfinch reading binge. A dark dramedy took shape in my head as I thought about how the complicated story of Psyche and her extended family might play if I dropped it into my world—a working class suburb in Houston, Texas—with full advantage of melodic Southern dialect and over-the-top Southern family dynamics. 

With brilliant editing from Joan Drury, Sugarland was published in 1999 by Spinsters Ink, a feisty little feminist press based in Duluth, Minnesota, and later by Bertelsmann, the parent company of Random House, in Europe. It did well, won a few awards, and got good reviews. The German translation, Fast wei im Paradies, was a bestseller and generated hundreds of letters, which was trippy, even though I had no idea if they were fan or hate mail. 

Best of all, Sugarland had a nice run with book clubs all over the United States; I was lucky enough to sit in on more than a hundred robust, wine-fueled discussions at bookstores, bars, and in readers’ homes—an eye-opening privilege I’ve not had with any other book. Even in 2001, when I was touring to promote my memoir, Bald in the Land of Big Hair, many book clubs I visited wanted to go back and rehash their previous year’s conversation about Sugarland. The story of Kit and Kiki turned out to be a vehicle for polarized, revealing conversations about how endemic sexism and misogyny haven’t changed that much over the past three thousand years, particularly when it comes to casual language and shaming qualifiers attached to sexual assault and domestic violence.

Lord, I wish this book would stop being so fucking relevant.

Kit and Kiki are caught up in the type of dreams and frustrations quickly understood by most young mothers. Kit’s husband Mel is a gentle salt-of-the-earth working man; Kiki’s husband Wayne is the golden son of a privileged family—a man whose good looks and charm mask a terrifying mean streak. The complex arc of the story arises from an incident revealed in succinct emotional and physical detail close to the beginning of the book: Kit is raped by Wayne. Later in the book, Wayne violently beats and rapes his wife, and the language purposely echoes the rape of Kit, which is less physically violent but no less monstrous. Both assaults are clearly about power, not sex.

The damage done to Kit as her children and her sister's children are sleeping on the floor just a few feet away takes her into Psyche’s perilous realm. She loses herself to shame and denial and methodically destroys her own life. In the midst of that desperate downward spiral, Kit has a comforting sexual encounter with Ander, her longtime friend and employer. Again, the language was carefully constructed to demonstrate the difference between the rape and this situation in which Kit is a willing participant.

From the Library Journal review (emphasis mine): “When both sisters become pregnant for the third time, suffering ensues: cataclysmic loss for Kiki and overwhelming guilt for Kit, unsure of her unborn child's paternity after a virtual assault by Wayne and a spontaneous tumble with her boss.”

Ponder with me the problematic false equivalence of “virtual assault” and “spontaneous tumble”—or the problematic notion that “virtual assault” is even a thing.

From Publisher's Weekly: “Meanwhile, Kit has two quickie flings, resulting in a pregnancy of questionable paternity. Readers with true equality of the sexes on their minds may object that Kiki's husband’s cheating is treated as an actionable offense while Kit's marital excursions are permitted the luxury of mitigating circumstances.”

Quickie.

Fling.

I physically cough-barked when I saw that. At least the “marital excursion” enjoyed the “luxury of mitigating circumstances.” Because getting raped is a luxury, you see. ‘Cause then you have a good excuse when you explain yourself to the satisfaction of—gah! Whatever. These are two reviews among many that had high praise for the book itself but proved the book’s point with semantic bet-hedging over whether it really counts as rape if a woman wasn’t adequately beaten before, during, or after she was forcibly penetrated. The assumption is that Kit—unhappy in her tepid marriage—was consciously or subconsciously asking for it. And what a feminazi I was for treating poor Wayne’s “cheating” as an “actionable offense”! 

Note to anyone doing jury duty: IT IS. 

When I visited book clubs, which were populated overwhelmingly by women readers, I was astounded to find that discussions often centered, at least in part, on what Kit could have and should have done to prevent the rape from happening. 

And we wonder why 90% of sexual assaults go unreported.

When I told Joan Drury about these book club conversations, she said, “Now you know why this book is important. They’re having the conversation. They’re talking about it. That’s a victory.”

Two decades later, the #MeToo movement sparked some hope. Feminists of my daughter’s generation—girls who came of age with women gynecologists, harassment laws, and access (for the moment) to safe, legal abortion—are not shy about raining down internet outrage on someone like Rep. Todd Aiken (R-Missouri), who claimed in 2012 that rape could not result in pregnancy, because “if it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut the whole thing down.” 

Aiken promptly got shut down his own self, but let’s face it, no dumbass is an island. This was not one guy’s political faux pas; this is an agenda embraced by a lot of people to justify private judgements and public policies that degrade and harm women on several levels. And that’s why we have to keep the conversation going. Women need to go there—with each other, with our daughters, and with the people who represent us in Congress. It would be nice to think that the good fight fought by Joanie Drury and her sisters would be sufficient to secure safety, health, civil rights, equal pay, and mutual respect for future generations of women.

Note to my daughter: It wasn’t. 

Apparently, it never will be. The good fight goes on, but I remain hopeful. Someday, we—the body female—will spread our wings and shut that whole thing down.

Sugarland is out of the vault, available in paperback and on all ebook platforms.

Sunday, March 20, 2022

Sugarland is fresh out of the vault

My second novel, published in 1999 by Spinsters Ink in the USA and Bertelsmann in Europe, is out of the vault, available in paperback and on all ebook platforms. I love the stunning cover illustration by Kapo Ng. All about womanhood and wings. 

Flap Copy:

Childhood singing stars Kit and Kiki Smithers are all grown up, young mothers navigating the joys and frustrations of suburban life. When their small world is shattered by an insidious act of sexual violence, the two sisters call on memories of an old story their mother used to tell: a tale of goddesses, monsters, and a series of seemingly impossible tasks whereby a girl, betrayed and broken, finds her way out of the underworld into the light.


The myth of Psyche and Eros takes on new meaning in this modern retelling, poetically tapping into the tornadic forces of feminism, resilience, independence, and art. Sugarland, an international bestseller shortlisted for multiple awards, is a graceful novel filled with compassion, as relevant today as it was when book clubs throughout the United States and Europe first embraced it more than twenty years ago.

Kudos:

"Heartbreaking, hilarious... poignantly authentic. This talented author brings pen and ink people to flesh and blood fulfillment."

SOUTHERN LIVING

In the wake of trauma and betrayal, two pregnant sisters spread their wings and discover an unimagined source of strength.

"Alternately wrenching and humorous... This is the stuff of book club discussion."

Publishers Weekly

 

"Bittersweet and priceless. Rodgers' multilayered Sugarland tells some not-so-sweet tales. "

Chicago Tribune

Monday, March 14, 2022

Soft-hearted friends and hard-boiled fiction

My love for hardboiled detective fiction dates back to a glorious summer after sixth grade, during which I read my way around an entire rusted carousel rack of cheap paperback mysteries at the public library in Onalaska, Wisconsin. Drawn to the pulp fiction cover art, I started with Farewell, My Lovely and The Big Sleep by Raymond Chandler, gateway drugs for Mildred Pierce and The Postman Always Rings Twice by James M. Cain. Many forgettable dime novels followed, but there were some wonderful ones in there as well. Cain’s Double Indemnity made such an impression on me that I immediately recognized the cover when I saw it thirty years later in a vintage bookstore in Texas, triggering a whole new hardboiled binge, which took in the complete works of Dashiell Hammett.

Coming to these books from the perspective of a seasoned writer, I found a whole new joy in the terse prose and a whole new dismay in the blatant sexism, racism, and homophobia. I expanded my hardboiled deep dive to include Agatha Christie, Josephine Tey, Val McDermid, and Elmore Leonard. (I was completely chuffed to discover among the acknowledgements that I’d had editors in common with both McDermid and Leonard.)

This was not the genre where I wanted to hang out long-term as a writer, but I couldn’t resist the challenges presented by this sort of procedural fiction: structural knots, moral ambiguity, gritty dialogue. It struck me as the perfect vehicle for sending up old school isms and skewering literary snootiness. Developing Smartie’s style for the Smack Wilder novels is the most fun I’ve ever had on paper.

Revisiting the manuscript in preparation for this 10th Anniversary Edition, I laughed out loud, and I hope readers will too. This gimlet-eyed view of the writing process and publishing industry is true, in spirit, to my experience as a writer, especially the portrayal of Smartie’s critique group, The Quilters.

My own critique group, The Midwives, five dedicated professional writers, met every other Friday evening in the suburbs of Houston. Colleen Thompson, our unofficial high priestess, is a successful romantic suspense novelist who wrote The Salt MaidenThe Off SeasonFatal Error, and many others. Barbara Taylor Sissel has written several crime-centered family dramas including Evidence of LifeFaultlines, and Tell No One. Thieme Bittick, who wrote as TJ Bennett, is the author of fantasy novels The LegacyThe Promise, and Dark Angel. Wanda Dion had been successfully published as a YA author and was looking to spread her wings in a darker direction. 

Being in The Midwives was one of the greatest experiences of my personal and professional life. These fabulously funny, intelligent, well read, compassionate, and talented women worked hard and upheld high craft standards. There was no jealousy or competitiveness, because we all understood that book writers don’t compete with each other; they compete with television, Facebook, and other time-sucks that prevent people from reading. What I learned from them about writing, publishing, mothering, and life could fill another book.

We always began with half an hour of lively conversation, during which we allowed one snack and one snack only: Chex Mix. Long before I joined the group, they’d decided that fussing over hostess duties was not a good use of a writer’s time. We all showed up with five hard copies of our weekly pages and read in a round robin: each author would read her ten pages aloud without interruption while the rest of us took notes, then we’d discuss for fifteen or twenty minutes. We were staunchly supportive of each other’s work, but no punches were pulled. No gratuitous praise was offered in the spirit of “being nice,” because we all knew that it’s not nice to be lied to and sent out bare-assed into an unforgiving publishing ethos. When The Midwives told me, “This is working,” I knew it was solid. When something wasn’t working, I could rely on them to speak the truth in a loving, helpful context.

Colleen, whose husband was a fireman, was especially sharp when it came to all things first responder. Like me, she’s a research fiend, and we shared a few rollicking research road trips, driving through a herd of buffalo in Yellowstone Park, trudging across the West Texas desert to view the Marfa Lights, and wandering the eerie murals in an old resort where Nazi brass had been housed as prisoners of war. These are adventures I couldn’t have shared with anyone but other than a fellow writer nerd—someone who really gets the wealth of inspiration that happens when you smell the inside of a toolbox or examine the texture of a taco shell.

After seven intensely productive, joyful years, Bobbi moved to the Hill Country, I relocated to the beach in Washington State, and the critique group drifted apart. We remain lifelong friends, and that powerful critique model informs the work I do now, mentoring and nurturing small groups of writers at Westport Lighthouse Writers Retreat. We Midwives celebrated each other’s successes and cried for each other’s heartaches. We believed in each other’s talent and forgave each other’s foibles, because, at the end of the day, we were five women who loved each other.

The greatest blessing I could hope for any writer is to find such a tribe.

Tuesday, February 15, 2022

The Hurricane Lover: Backstory of a stormy soul project

As a ghostwriter, it's important for me to carve out time for soul projects: books that I can't not write. The Hurricane Lover is one of those. Eleven years after its original publication, I'm thrilled to bring it out of the vault with this fabulous new cover by Kapo Ng. 

I was storm-obsessed long before the epic hurricane season of 2005. I was born in the American Midwest, where summer storms brought green skies and the smell of tornados. For one wonderful year, my family lived in a rundown townhome on the beach in Florida. During the offseason, the Gulf of Mexico turned steely, wind whipped up blades of white sand, and skies blackened over the glorious chaos. Wrapped in a blanket on the balcony outside the room I shared with my three sisters, I hugged my knees and counted the seconds between thunder and lightning. 

In 2005, my husband Gary and I were living in Houston, Texas, not far from the upscale area where Bob and Char Hoovestahl live in the book. New Orleans was an easy daytrip for music and great food, and it was a convenient stop just on the way to my sister’s house in Lake Mary, Florida. I was familiar with the small towns, swamps, and fruit markets off the I-10 exits. In the early morning hours of August 29, I worried for the people living close to the shore. I admit, I was among those who blew off warnings about the mass destruction of New Orleans. I didn’t think about that. It was unthinkable. 


Story vampire that I am, I watched the catastrophe evolve thinking I might have to find a way to use it in a book someday. I’d never written anything in the thriller genre, but I’d thought about it. One of my critique mates, Colleen Thompson, is a master of romantic suspense. I learned a lot about procedural structure from her standalone thrillers, The Salt Maiden and Fatal Error, specifically the core craft values of atmosphere, plot-driven character arcs, and blow-by-blow action scenes. I was ready to try my hand, just waiting for the right story to hit me.


In the wake of the storm, Gary and I volunteered with Operation Compassion, an interfaith effort to receive, assist, feed, and house hundreds of thousands of storm survivors who flooded into Houston. Downtown at Reliant Center, I cleaned bathrooms, served food, and hauled ice and beverages up and down the long lines of people deboarding buses and waiting for hours in the oppressive heat to fill out FEMA paperwork. It was a privilege to meet people in this extraordinary moment. The air was thick with humidity and stories, and I felt myself doing what a robin does when it’s building a nest—gathering a thread here and a twig there, weaving it into a place where I might create something. When I heard a weary New Orleans police officer comment, “This is great for media people and con artists,” the story hammer dropped. 


I went home sunburned crawfish red and exhausted to the bone, but the characters had come for me. Corbin, Shay, and Queen Mab grabbed my hands and dragged me into the swampy mist. I sat up writing until dawn, napped for a few hours, and then went back to Reliant Center to keep doing whatever I could do to help. The skeleton of the story quickly took shape in my head, but I didn’t have time to do more than sketch out a few scenes. Just four weeks after Hurricane Katrina, Hurricane Rita screamed into the Gulf, headed straight for Houston, and I realized a much larger story was yet to unfold. 

Gary and I sheltered in place, following zoned recommendations, and we watched in horror as almost everyone else in our neighborhood panicked and bugged out. The hurricane veered off and lost a lot of spin before it landed, but the Houston metroplex was engulfed in a 200-mile-wide traffic jam—fact far crazier than any fiction I could have conjured—so, of course, that became a plot point that rewrote the ending I had planned. We experienced the remnants of Rita as a violent summer storm and sat without power for a few days. I recharged my laptop in my car and kept writing. 


That winter, I was hip deep in a celebrity ghostwriting project, and the following year, my third novel went into the pipeline at HarperCollins, so I couldn’t give The Hurricane Lover the undivided attention it takes to finish a novel, but this turned out to be a good thing. I hadn’t yet wrapped my head around the true extent of the research that would be needed to give this book the depth I wanted it to have. I didn’t even think about the documents that might later be released via the Freedom of Information Act, not the least of which turned out to be a thousand pages of email sent and received by Michael Brown in the days immediately before and after Hurricane Katrina.


For two years, while I wrote and published three other books, I continued gathering threads and twigs. I interviewed meteorologists, homicide detectives, an internist, an arborist, an architectural historian, plumbers, contractors, and many storm survivors from various walks of life. I watched with keen interest as New Orleans dragged herself out of the mud. I pored over thousands of weather bulletins, storm forecasts, government documents, and police reports and waded through a dense swamp of FEMA email and media releases. 


The research was heartbreaking. Infuriating. 


So much suffering could have been prevented, and so little had been learned from it in the years since. The blue vs red ideological divide had cost thousands of lives. Rather than embrace unity and common sense, people trenched down into whichever we the people they identified with, and in the South, that boundary was starkly color coded. The story became more layered. I relished the idea of a book club uncorking a bottle of wine and taking on these issues, gloves off.


The book was still missing one pivotal character: the storm. I tried again and again to draft the passages in which Shay and Corbin make their way through the eyewall. It just felt like a lot of words describing what I thought it might be like. What did it smell like? What was the strata of sound beneath the screaming wind? How does a hurricane feel on your skin? I needed to know. In September 2008, I had the opportunity to find out.


Hurricane Ike fulfilled all the dire predictions made before Hurricane Rita (lacking the one dire prediction that mattered.) When the call for evacuation came out, Gary and I made the decision to shelter in place. Gary, still an airline mechanic at the time, knew he’d be needed at the airport immediately after the storm, and we feared our elderly dogs wouldn’t do well away from home. 


As Bonnie and Corbin do in the book, we filled the garage freezer with gallon jugs of water and stocked the pantry with batteries, protein bars, and other storm supplies. The eye of the hurricane made landfall in Galveston as a Cat 2 and moved inland along the east side of Houston. I watched CNN until the power went out, and then I sat in the garage on an Adirondack chair tucked in the back corner between my car and the chest freezer. Clutching a Maglite, I listened to the car radio and snacked on Sun Chips and homemade vegetable juice. 


Beyond the open garage door, there was utter darkness cut by frequent lightning. I waited until the storm escalated to what I thought might be the eyewall. Then I strapped my son’s bike helmet on my head and went out into the street. My plan was to walk through the park across the street, but the towering pine trees that surrounded the playground were casting off branches and cones. In the strobe effect of the lightning, I could see that the air above the playground was filled with projectiles. Best to stay in the street, I decided. Walk around the block and call it good.


I pushed to the end of the driveway and sloshed through ankle-deep water gushing up from the gutter drains. I tried to turn my face away from the scouring rain, but it seemed to be coming from every direction. Bits of bark and God knows what drummed on the bike helmet. I felt weightless and weak, gasping for breath, pushing one step at a time against the force of the wind. Two or three houses down, I accepted the fact that this whole idea was incredibly stupid, and I turned back, fighting to keep my balance. The half block back to my house felt like a mile. 


A few yards from the end of my driveway, I heard what sounded like the crack of a rifle. A large limb from a tall pecan tree smashed to the ground, and then another limb, and another until the whole tree gave in, like an umbrella closing. A towering oak that loomed over our front yard moaned and flailed. This tree brayed like a wounded animal, its wide trunk bending to an extent I wouldn’t have believed possible. I scurried back to my Adirondack chair and sat, shivering and giddy, trying to find words for what I’d experienced. 


The storm was everything I had imagined: razorblade rain, pelting debris, body slam wind, galactic noise, the peculiar smell of ozone and wet cement. What I hadn’t anticipated was how deeply, viscerally frightening it would be. I expected to feel small; I did not expect to feel swallowed. I didn’t know the storm would be as present within me as it was around me, in the ringing of my ears, the hammering of my heart, and a resounding pressure that seemed to push the plates of my skull apart. This was not the green-eyed summer storm of my childhood; this was the jackboot of a jealous god.


Hurricane Ike decimated Galveston. On the real-life beach where I’d placed Billy’s bar and Shay’s fictional sanctuary, only one home was left standing. Houston’s infrastructure was crippled. In our neighborhood, far from the worst of the destruction, I’d say at least half of the big trees came down. The corner of our front porch was torn away, and our back deck and pergola were reduced to rubble. Miraculously, the old oak was still standing, but we lost three pecan trees. I hate the tall privacy fences that hash up every Houston neighborhood, so it gave me a modicum of mean pleasure to see 90% of them flattened, an apt metaphor for our common plight.


The postapocalyptic suburb was a ghost town. It was almost eight weeks before power was fully restored. Our generous neighbors, George and Toni, invited us to string a series of orange extension cords over to their generator so we could plug in the refrigerator and one lamp. By day, I conducted a guerrilla book mobile from the back of my yellow VW Bug, supplying books to the neighborhood kids and folks waiting in the long gas lines. By night, I unplugged the fridge and plugged in my computer, in the zone, fleshing out a finished draft of The Hurricane Lover


I didn’t rush to publish. I wasn’t willing to make the compromises I knew I’d have to make if I put it into the mainstream publishing pipeline. Massive shifts in the publishing business model were making it possible to self-publish on a level we’d never seen in the industry. When I finally pulled the trigger on November 11, 2011, I had resources I couldn’t have imagined in 2005 when I started writing this book. During its first year, the ebook was downloaded more than 90,000 times—more than the combined total sales of my first three novels.


In 2021, my 33rd book, a celebrity ghostwriting project, debuted at #1 on the New York Times bestseller list, but I can honestly say that The Hurricane Lover still feels like the greatest success of my career thus far. It was a soul project that demanded a lot from me and asks a lot of the reader. The message beneath the mystery is more relevant than ever. Our political divide has deepened to a seemingly uncrossable chasm as disinformation and fascism find new footholds in our country. The warnings of climate scientists are still largely unheeded. Even those of us who are willing to accept the enormity of the situation are daunted by the mandate for significant changes in the average American consumer’s voracious way of life.


In 2017, as Gary prepared to retire, we decided to move from Houston to our vacation place on the beach in Washington State. Gary’s supervisor at the airline kept asking him to stay a little longer, so we put off the move again and again. I started having a strange recurring dream in which my mother, who had died a few years before, was jamming my things into big boxes, telling me, “Hurry! You need to go now.” It was unsettling enough that I finally told Gary, “I’m going to Westport. You can catch up with me when you’re ready.” He agreed to put through the paperwork so we could leave together the first week of August.


I spent weeks downsizing, digitizing important papers and family photos, purging clutter. I packed up the furniture and belongings we really cared about, securing them for storage with plans to ship everything in a month or so. We took only a few things with us: a strongbox of important documents, my mother’s ukulele, several pieces of art that we didn’t want handled by movers, and two small suitcases with clothes for the road trip.


We arrived at our home on the Pacific Coast on August 19, 2017. On August 26, Hurricane Harvey, a catastrophic Cat 4 megastorm, swept the Gulf Coast. Our home in Houston was flooded to the ceiling. 


I sat on the beach 2,500 miles away, looking out at the Pacific Ocean, weeping for our dear friends and neighbors who’d lost their homes and for the music venues, art galleries, and historic structures in this beautiful city we had loved and lived in for 23 years. I thought about the river of filth and debris that Shay waded through as the sun went down on the ruined city of New Orleans. That same river flowed through Houston now, and as far as I knew, all the belongings we’d so carefully put into storage were part of it. 


But we were not. 


We’d made the decision to step away from the city and lead a different kind of life. It was a big change, but people are capable of big changes when we choose to be. And change happens, whether we choose it or not. Change comes, catalyzed by decision or rained down by fate, an unstoppable force of nature that floats away the wooden chairs and garden gnomes, robbing us of our clutter, leaving us shaken but wiser. 


The Hurricane Lover is available in paperback and ebook at your favorite book retailer. 


Monday, February 14, 2022

The Hurricane Lover is out of the vault

 

As Hurricane Katrina howls toward New Orleans, Dr. Corbin Thibodeaux, a firebrand climatologist, preaches the gospel of evacuation, weighed down by the spectacularly false alarm he raised a year earlier. Meanwhile, journalist Shay Hoovestahl is tracking a con artist who uses storm-related chaos as cover for identity theft and murder. She drags Corbin into her plan, which goes horribly awry as the city’s infrastructure crumbles, a media circus spins out of control, and another megastorm begins to brew in the Gulf of Mexico. The Hurricane Lover is a fast-paced tale of two cities—one ruled by denial, the other by fear—and two people whose stormy love affair is complicated by polarized politics, high-strung Southern families, and the worst disaster management goat-screw in US history.


Drawing on firsthand experience, Joni Rodgers writes knowingly about the dramatic megastorms, weaving in climatology studies, riveting blow-by-blow weather reports and forecasts, and actual FEMA emails later released through the Freedom of Information Act. In this special 10th Anniversary Edition, bonus material looks back on the eerie prescience with which The Hurricane Lover—which was never meant to be more than a can’t-put-it-down thriller—foreshadowed a climate in crisis and a democracy coming apart at the seams.

Friday, February 04, 2022

Cover me! Designer Kapo Ng captures my writing vibe


I'm on a publishing high this winter, rolling out the #SIXObooks to celebrate turning 60. Challenged with the idea of branding six books that have only one thing in common (me), I gave designer Kapo Amos Ng the baseline concept "neo-retro, if that's a thing - like 1970s Polish poster art" and he ran with it. 

My favorite moments are the Sugarland butterfly (that fabulous twist of Georgia O'Keeffe!) and Smartie's old school typewriter. Across the board, Kapo nailed the quirky, ironic, vaguely perverse, and occasionally pissed off joie de vivre that defines my writing vibe. When I look at these books, I see the stories inside. In many ways, it's the story of my life.

Crazy for Trying: the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly reviews

In the coming weeks, I'll be rolling out fresh editions of six bestselling backlist books. Feel like doing me a birthday solid? Read and review one or more! 

This week, Crazy for Trying, a Barnes & Noble Discover Award finalist originally published 25 years ago, is out of the vault, available in paperback and ebook. Over the years, this book has generated reviews that run the gamut from effusive flattery to punch in the face. I'm truly grateful to every reader and reviewer who took the time and energy to respond. Yes, even the ones who hated it. 

😎The Good: (The Brontë moment still fills my heart with joy.)
"Think Jane Eyre with rock and roll." - Houston Press

"Refreshing and provocative." - Houston Chronicle

"A fresh pleasure...Rodgers writers love scenes that scorch the pages." - Orlando Sentinel

"Truly captivating...inevitable comparisons to McMurtry and McGuinn, but Rodgers' prose and style are unique." - Texas Books in Review

"[Rodgers'] prose is dazzling, risky, and intoxicating, and at its heart, Crazy for Trying is an inspired debut." Pam Houston, author of Cowboys Are My Weakness

😬The Bad: (I'm not sure why it's insulting, but I'm pretty sure it is.)
"Rodgers debuts with a good-woman-heals-damaged-man fable, gussied up with pretty Montana scenery and late-night-radio atmospherics."
Kirkus

😂The Ugly: (How harsh are you normally?)
"Horrible may just be to mild a description of what I thought of this book and I am not normally this harsh. I desperately tried to get through chapter 3 but couldn't torture myself any further." 
Reader review




Wednesday, February 02, 2022

How my debut novel and I gave birth to each other during chemo

I'm celebrating turning 60, rolling out fresh editions of six backlist books. Watch this space and follow me on Instagram for opportunities to score autographed copies. Out of the vault this week: Crazy for Trying 25th Anniversary Author's Cut, my debut novel originally published by MacMurray & Beck in 1996.

This book and I gave birth to each other in the mid-1990s while I was undergoing chemotherapy for non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma, a virulent blood cancer. My prognosis was poor: a 50 percent chance of survival up to five years. Anything beyond that was “statistically negligible.” I was thirty-two years old, confronted with the question: How does one live a full life by some metric other than time? 

I developed a five-year plan that included two realistically achievable goals: First: Vigilant in word and deed, I would leave a handprint of lovingkindness on my five-year-old daughter, Jerusha, and my seven-year-old son, Malachi, hoping that would give substance to their incomplete memories of me. Second: I would write one good book and get it published. 

As a talented dabbler, I’d been working on a wad of purple prose and zingy dialogue that vaguely resembled a book. Most first novels are autobiographical in some way, and I did borrow details from my life for Tulsa, my zaftig protagonist. There were stories I wanted to tell my daughter, and some of them are injected here, but I purposely made this book recognizably not a roman à clef. I hoped that, in my absence, my daughter would eventually understand that all these characters are, in some aspect, me: Tulsa, whose seeking instinct overcomes her self-loathing. Mac, who finds his best life when he’s at his most broken. Anne Marie, the overwhelmed mommy. Alexandra, a compulsive creator of words, and Jeanne (pronounced in my mind like jay-ann, not gene), a purveyor of shalom. The radio listeners, the passersby, the mountains, the music, the dead—I wanted my daughter to know that I was all and none of these so that she would feel empowered to be all and none of whomever she pleased. I wanted her to see me in the pages of this book and see herself between the lines. 

As my real life became unbearable, I retreated into Mac and Tulsa’s world. Their story was a life raft I climbed onto; had I not found it, I would have drowned. I wrote and rewrote, loving the work and the self I became while doing it. As a lifelong voracious consumer of books, good and bad, I had a strong sense that this book was good. I refined a query packet that included a cover letter, synopsis, and the first thirty pages of the manuscript, sent out my first seventyish queries to agents and editors, and collected my first seventyish rejections. Most were form rejections, probably triggered by the bulk of the overwritten manuscript. As books tend to do when written in a vacuum, it had bloated like a beached orca. 

The personal query responses I did get contained high praise for the writing, heartening close-but-no-cigar agent-speak, and invitations to send my next book. Only one story-specific note came up again and again; agents consistently pointed to the Alexandra/Jeanne relationship as “off-putting” or a “deal-killer.” Everyone knows God didn’t create bisexuality until the mid-aughts, so for most mainstream agents in 1994, a nonbinary love story was the kiss of death unless it involved gay men or arcane reference to the price of salt. Tulsa’s mother, Alexandra, struggled in that version of the manuscript—as many of us did in real life—scorched equally by gay and straight sanctimony. 

One agent advised: “If the book is about that, it has to be about that. Otherwise, it’s just a hill you died on for no reason.” I didn’t want this book to be “about that,” but I did want my future girl to see bisexuality normalized in the context of a loving, long-term relationship that deserved to be a legal marriage blessed with the emotional bounty, healthcare parity, and tax advantages of any other marriage. I couldn’t accept the premise that bisexuality is so grotesque, the mere mention of it as an aspect of a secondary character makes the whole book “about that,” and the Alexandra in me suspected that if this book was being written by a man—queer or straight—he would not be dying on this hill or any other. 

I sent out a last round of queries, making only one change: The title page and cover letter said J. L. Rodgers instead of Joni Rodgers. Within a month, out of twelve queries, I had eleven requests for the full manuscript, which led to offers from two publishers. Every one of the positive responses began: Dear Mr. Rodgers . . .

I can laugh now—the luxuriously guilty laughter of the bullet-dodger. I survived, against all odds, in large part because Crazy for Trying gave me something to be. This book quite literally saved my life; now I’m returning the favor. 

I’m thrilled to present this 25th Anniversary Author’s Cut to the next generation of readers, including the fabulous woman my daughter has grown up to be. (She is now the same age I was when I wrote this book. Insert “mind blown” emoji.) The story is unchanged for the most part, but all the greenhorn machinations, flabby adverbs, and exclamation points are safely biodegrading in the landfills of literary history. This made room to restore some of the original banter that defined Mac and Tulsa’s relationship, which was always more Socratic dialogue than romance. 

I’m a grandmother now, in the twenty-sixth year of my five-year plan, still striving to leave a handprint of lovingkindness. Whatever book I’m working on today is that one good book into which I pour my good intentions, but Crazy for Tryingwill always have a special home in my soul. It was my sanctuary and school of hard knocks. 

When Crazy for Trying was first published in 1996, Lisa Gray’s review in the Houston Press summed it up perfectly: “Think Jane Eyre with rock and roll.” Enough has changed—and not changed—about love, addiction, motherhood, and sexism that Tulsa’s story, like Jane’s, remains relevant and, I hope, entertaining. Thank you for being part of her journey and mine.

Tuesday, February 01, 2022

Out of the vault: CRAZY FOR TRYING 25th Anniversary Author's Cut

In the coming weeks, I'll be rolling out fresh editions of six bestselling backlist books. Watch this space and follow me on Instagram for opportunities to score autographed copies. 

This week, Crazy for Trying, my debut novel originally published 25 years ago by MacMurray & Beck is out of the vault, available in paperback and ebook. 



Here's the logline:

In 1970s Montana, a zaftig disc jockey sets out to reinvent herself, fleeing the shadow of her two (in)famous moms—a radical author/activist and an aging hippie artist—but she's soon embroiled in volitile office politics and an impossible love triangle, forced to choose between her mom’s artistic protégé and a damaged Viet Nam war vet. 




 

Saturday, January 29, 2022

The Big SIX-OH!

 I sent flowers to my mom every year on my birthday every year from the time I was a teenager until she passed away in 2014. As #5 of 6 kids, the day I was born - January 29, 1962 - was probably the only day it was just her and me. 

Mom was a writer, a newspaper editor, and a savant musician who could play anything with strings, keys, or foot pedals. She went by her middle name, Lois, but her first name was Wilma, which I thought was awesome because Wilma is obviously the best Flintstones character. 

She opened the door and brought me into a beautiful world 60 years ago today. I'm celebrating all the gifts Mom gave me, including my life and a deep love of language.

Here's the book she wrote about the building of the Fort Peck Dam.